There shouldn’t be one, end of discussion, okay, I guess we can all go home now, article done. Well, no, not quite, in the United States there’s been quite a hullabaloo about Transgender people. Discrimination against people in the Trans community has always existed, and it’s perfectly understandable why. As a society we’ve been so brought up into our existing gender roles, that anyone seen as violating that, appears to be an aberration. It’s exactly the same way with gay people and gay culture, people who grew up not seeing two men or two women expressing romantic affection for one another. Growing up I myself had these feelings, that what I was seeing was wrong somehow, and even now I still have a gut feeling that I can’t quite shut up. Does this make me transphobic, absolutely, the first thing they have you say in alcoholics anonymous is your name and that you’re an alcoholic. It is by recognising issues like this within ourselves that we are able to create a better change for the future. Most racists would never deign to call themselves a racist, I’m not a racist, I just think insert race here is largely responsible for crimes. I work every day towards being less transphobic, to understanding their experiences even though I myself cannot fully relate to them. So then why are you, an admitted recovering transphobe writing an article in defence of the trans community? Well thank you Mr. Strawman, the answer is quite simple because no human being should have to justify their own existence.
I don’t believe that being a transphobic person means you are a bad person, I think that it means you grew up in a society with strictly enforced gender roles. Where whenever you tried to do something associated with the other sex, you were browbeaten because of it. There was an experiment with monkeys in a cage with a ladder with bananas at the top. One of the monkeys would of course climb the ladder, but when they did the rest of the monkeys were splashed with cold water. So the next time a monkey tried to climb, they pulled it off and beat it. Eventually, the scientists replaced an old monkey with a new one, who invariably tried to climb the ladder, before being pulled down and beaten. When they replaced a second monkey, they noticed something strange, the first new monkey joined in the beating despite never having been touched with cold water. It got to the point where all the monkeys had been replaced, so none of them dared climb the ladder, but none of them knew why? I feel like this is a perfect analogy for gender roles in America, as young people were forced to abide by the existing system, to go on and continue the cycle.
So, now that we’ve established that I understand where you’re coming from, and I used to feel similarly myself. Let’s get into the explanation phase, and I’ll try to give you a basic explainer of what it feels like to be trans, from a lay perspective. I imagine that several Trans people could probably give a better perspective, but as I said earlier, no human being should have to justify their own existence. Imagine you wake up one morning you get out of bed, and everyone calls you by a name that isn’t your name, you’ve told people that’s not your name, but they still insist on calling you by it. They insist that you shouldn’t be wearing the outfit that you’re wearing, maybe you’re wearing makeup and they think you shouldn’t, or maybe you aren’t but they think you should. Religious people insist that you’re going to hell, despite the fact that none of their holy books actually say anything about you in them. Constantly getting hassled about what bathroom you go to, being accused of lying about your gender just to be a pervert. A completely disingenuous argument made by the political party who argued that in a case of “legitimate rape” a woman’s body will shut it down. (here’s a link in case you think I’m making that up https://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/20/us/politics/todd-akin-provokes-ire-with-legitimate-rape-comment.html I really wish I was) That sounds like a nightmare for just one day, imagine that being the rest of your life, and for those who say that they could handle it, put your money where your mouth is. Actually go out and try it, I have a feeling you’ll find it to be much harder than you expected.
I’ve read a lot of Mr. Rogers these days, and I think that that should be the message that we look at. The phrase “there’s no one in the whole world like you, and I like you just the way you are.” That’s a message I’d like to finish on, I know it’s hard to try and imagine things from the Trans perspective. I know that it’s hard to give up deep seated prejudices, but if it’s mentionable, it’s manageable. As you work your way through this I know you’ll find other issues in your life, that made you feel angry, or that made you feel hurt. Sometimes when you feel angry or hurt you want to make other people feel angry and hurt. It’s a real shame that trans folks have to be the target in this case, but I hope that reading this article has made you take another thought about things. Remember, there’s no one in the whole world like you, and I like you just the way you are. Not who your pain and anger has made you become, who you really are deep down inside.
Meditations of a Modern Life 